Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Scrubs and Scales

When I mention to people at work that I want to lose weight, I get a lot of "you don't need to" or "you look just fine" comments. This probably should be flattering. I had a coworker look at me and shake their head, almost in disgust, when they found out I was doing Profile. Again, should maybe be flattering. In scrubs, maybe I don't look like I need to lose any weight. But what does it say about me when I show up to happy hour in sweats, ALWAYS. And that I don't EVER wear jeans or cute tops to work (partially because I just change into scrubs anyway), or that I NEVER come to work with more than foundation on. I am not proud of who I am. I am all for body loving, and 100% against body shaming. A 300 pound women may be incredibly proud of her body, and I say MORE POWER TO HER. If you love who you are, then rock on! I am jealous of those people who love their bodies, no matter what size they are. But the size I am now does not make me happy, I don't like who I see in the mirror right now. And trust me, it don't "want" to be skinny, and I have mentioned before I have definitely accepted the fact that I will never be a super model, and that is okay. And really, I have a number in mind of where I would want to be, but if I am comfortable and happy 5 or 10 lbs higher than that, then that is my goal. I just want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I want to WANT to wear cute clothes, do my makeup a little bit, "gussy up" if you will. But I don't. I don't want to draw attention to myself in any way. I don't want people looking at me. But those are also the very things I want to change. But its my body and my choice. And bringing someone down when you find out they are working towards a goal is just wrong.

So when you find out someone is on yet another diet, or trying the new fad, and in your mind think they don't need to lose weight, instead of actually saying it, SUPPORT THEM. Give them a pat on the back, encourage them, because you never know their reasons.